Aka – I love my brother but will never say it to his face. So my baby bro ain’t so baby anymore. He turns 15 tomorrow and towers over me now, the lanky freak. I think every older sibling knows that no matter how much you love your little sister or brother, you can’t say it to them too much, for a couple reasons. Firstly, you don’t want them to have too high an opinion of themselves. If they get to confident they don’t need you to love them as much. That’s how sibling relationships work. You gently bully each other so that you each start to hate yourselves and need the other to love you more. Yes it’s mildly abusive but the love is real. And obviously that was a JOKE!.... kind of. Secondly, at least for most of the people reading this, we’re British. Affection is a disease unless someone is drunk or dying. All jokes aside I think most people with siblings can relate to the fact that although we would die for them, we’re also likely to be the one who kills them. So, since it’s his birthday tomorrow, I thought I’d write a *shudder* nice post with all the things I refuse to say to his face on principal.
1. He could probably beat me in a fight but I would definitely kick him in the balls and he knows I could do it because I’m scrappy. 2. He can reach things off higher shelves than me. 3. He is a hundred times smarter than I could ever be and is going to shame me out of existence when his exam results come in the little bastard. 4. He is funnier than me, even if he does have to google jokes. 5. He’s better than me at everything even if I did it first. Dance, karate, football, drawing and just life in general.
Dude, I know I give you a hard time. But I couldn’t ask for a better brother. I could definitely ask for a cleaner and less messy one. But not a better one. Happy Birthday bro. Alright enough of the mushy sh*t. Stay out of my room and don’t touch me.
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